Friday, January 15, 2010

Game of love.

This week, aside from being in the mall for 4 consecutive days, Paramore's The Only Exception has been on loop. I've already heard of it even before but last Monday, I just fell in love with it. My eyes were already closed; the cold wind from the air-conditioning unit was brushing through my cheeks and my iPod's Quiet Storm playlist was playing. Boyz II Men, Mayer Hawthorne and Bon Iver serenaded me and then Hayley Williams' came in next. My mind was clear and relaxed; every word registered vividly. Being the emotional girl that I am, I was touched and was already on the verge of tears. You may find it weird but whatever, I have always find comfort in crying. And the song is just so nice!

I had sworn to myself that I'm content with loneliness
because none of it was ever worth the risk
Well, you are the only exception

This week, 4 people asked me why I still don't have a boyfriend and they all left me flabbergasted. I honestly don't find something wrong with my independence and I'm quite used to it, actually. Oh, the joys of not having to worry about someone and adjust plans for that person. Plus, I'm spared from all the drama. Late last year, some of my friends told me that they remind me of Summer from (500) Days Of Summer because they think that I don't believe in love. I disagree. Really. I'm not cynical, thank you. And actually, if there's one thing I'm afraid of, it's forgetting how it feels like to love and to be loved.

One day, I know I'll wake up and at that time, I'll realize that I would want to settle down. Not the marriage, paying endless bills, have lovely children and have a family kind of way yet. But one day, I'll wake up and would finally want to get involved - romantically. I have always admitted how alluring it is to have someone you could send "Good morning, I love you." messages to, someone who'll drive you home, kiss you goodnight or simply someone you could share your day with. Love is such a big word and yes, I believe in it. It’s just that I'm just taking my time 'cos love comes when you're ready to embrace it for all it's worth. The right person will come at the right time and at the right reason and I swear, it’s gonna be awesome. Someday, I know I'll get to dedicate The Only Exception to someone but for now, I'll enjoy the happiness in this freedom.

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